Day 4… 4 Numbers on!

That’s right! Fourth full day of rehearsal and we were able to do a run through of 4 pieces together tonight. My job currently consists of a lot of prop pushing and dancing, and I am having SUCH a good time with that. I didn’t get a chance to take any pictures today because it was all-hands-on-deck while we were staging one of the numbers. Good news, though! Others in the cast are taking pictures on their breaks so I will be sure to post some of those pictures as they come available to me. The choreo we’re doing so far is VERY different from things I’ve been asked to do in the past. It’s challenging, but nothing I and the rest of the cast can’t handle. I just need reps to get my body moving in this new style that Michael is teaching us. I love it. Love, love, love it, even if I suck at it so much right now. I’ll get better!

Speaking of getting better, today was a day of growth for me. I hesitate to share my struggles in a public forum, but, as I said before, this blog is for ME, so I’m going to write about it. You have the choice of whether you read it or not – there’s a link at the bottom.

Anyway. The most amazing things I’m seeing so far are coming from the visual ensemble. No offense to the hornline or my fellow prop pushers, of course, but I think many of them would agree with me. The whole soundtrack is beautiful, but especially the Visual Ensemble feature we saw tonight. They’re all such incredible dancers and spinners – I could watch them for hours. I hope I can get permission to post some videos soon!

I lied, I did take one picture. I intend to ask what these coffee filtering contraptions are at some point, but I assume it’s a method of slow brewing or steeping coffee. It’s cool. Their cold brew is delicious.

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I really don’t have bad days very often… but today I spent my meal breaks by myself down at the coffee shop I wrote about yesterday thinking and reflecting. I guess the reason I don’t have many bad days is because my mentality is, “There’s no such thing as a bad day, just a bad attitude.” Today was definitely a test to see if I could take my own advice. It took a decent bit of convincing and pep talking on my part, but by the time I finished my dinner and my coffee I was on the other side of some mental and emotional walls that had come in my way throughout the course of the day. I don’t want to talk too much about it, but I went to a place of pretty strong self-doubt today. I really crushed MY OWN confidence, and it’s hard to do what they’re asking me to do here when I’m feeling disappointed in myself. The reality of my day, however, was that the only person disappointed in me was ME, and I needed to get out of my own head. As I was walking to dinner I found myself listing a number of things that were, in my eyes, defeating me… so when I got to Barista Parlor I got out my notepad and wrote “There’s no such thing as a bad day, just a bad attitude” at the top of the page, and then made a list of ways I could change my attitude. I wasn’t feeling 100% by the time I finished my initial list, but I was feeling better, so I kept brainstorming (and talking to some wonderful friends back home ❤) and got to a really good place with about half a page of things that I could do to change my attitude and make the best out of the obstacles I was facing. With that, I walked back to rehearsal and the rest of the night was wonderful for me. I felt alert, energized, and ready to push my prop around with the most performance quality I possibly could. I’m sharing a stage with a lot of AMAZING performers here, with strong presence and energy, and I’m trying to soak up and feed off of them as much as possible. I may not be the most brilliant musician here, and I may only be pushing an easel around the floor at the moment, but I’m going to be the best [dang] easel pusher anyone’s ever SEEN. That’s how I approached rehearsal tonight… because that’s what I had control to change, and it made a 100% difference in how I felt for the rest of the night and how I’m feeling when I go to bed in a few minutes.

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